Sometimes I wonder...

Special Feature Of The Day: 
The Gazette - SHADOW

Tomorrow is my birthday. 
I don't know why, but I'm not really looking forward to it. 


It started out with me being really excited about it and all that. 
As time passed, I just felt like there was no more meaning to it anymore.. 
As in. I'm really glad there's this thing called "birthdays", but what's the point if no one celebrates it with you? 


I'm emo. I admit. I mean, I'm just different, right? 
Because of my younger brother, I am constantly being exposed to all kinds of boyish stuff all the time. 
So for me, I can take blood and gore just as well as (or even better than) any other guy. 
Apparently, girls who can take pain (as in LITERALLY), blood, gore and listens to rock music isn't appealing to other girls.   


But I guess I never did fit in. 
I always felt that I was forcing my way in.. 
Not being someone that people will turn to when they want to, but rather someone to turn to when left with no other choice. 


I'm tired of being hurt like that. I just don't get why I'm like that. 
I know I'm not good looking but are people nowadays really so superficial? 
Do they really just choose friends by looks? 
Rather than seeing who will stay by your side when you are at your lowest? 
Even my "best" friend from primary school is ignoring me now. 


I'm tired. I don't wanna think anymore. 
Maybe its just me.
But then again..
Oh well, I guess its really me. 


SORRY WORLD. 
SORRY FOR BEING A GIRL WHO CAN TAKE PAIN, BLOOD, GORE AND SOMEONE WHO LIKES JROCK. 
SORRY FOR WATCHING GORE FOR THE PAST 8 YEARS OF MY LIFE. 
SORRY FOR BEING SOMEONE WHO IS NOT ACCEPTED. 
SORRY FOR BEING ME.